I had an experience recently of being in an ornery mood, so I went outside to “get away from it.” As I was settling into the fresh air, away from my bad mood, I realized of course that the mood “followed me.” I just had to laugh at my effort to “get away from myself.”
I spent most of August by myself.
I’ve been on a personal retreat, taking time to integrate many new things that I’ve been learning and to have time for reflection, contemplation, and integration. I know that I have had plenty of moments like the one above, where I try to “get away from myself” for one reason or another. But this time, I was able to become aware of the dynamics within the pattern and have a gentle laugh about it.
Taking some time away from others, to be really alone and in a reflective state of mind offers this kind of awareness. It’s not always fun living with an inner grump. It takes effort and intention to transform my inner world into an authentically happier place.
Inch by inch I make my way to becoming a better friend to myself.
I regard healing as a process of moving toward a more peaceful and fun inner world, and “health” as the ongoing return to contentment, vitality and joy in body, mind and spirit.
May you always have time and space to know and enjoy yourself.